Alli (neugotik) wrote,

  • Music:

do I have to talk? why, wait ... no, you know maybe it's my turn to rest Yay.

Sorry - I've been thinking a lot more & talking/posting less. I guess I don't have to say sorry for that.

I had a realization today, that's akin to that actually.... about talking, which I shared with my mom while we got ready to workout at the Y (I dragged her to Pilates class which she enjoyed, because she's crazy like me - and my mom agreed that she is guilty of having the same idea I had/was expressing to her). What is it?

O.k.; it's this:

I feel I have to talk. It's like, I have to keep people entertained and engaged with each other. I am also guilty of being always busy, like my mom. I noticed as I shoved stuff in our shared locker that she was appoligizing for making me wait & hold her hat/gloves - I said it's fine, I don't mind waiting for people. That's when I realized her, me, most my family is fine being still if we are helping another person/but otherwise, we feel obliged to make an effort: work, pick up a project, or entertain. Can't be just, still quiet and take it all in.

Well, I'm kinda in the mood to change that : I kinda want to be like a number of friends I have, admitedly mostly guys,but that might or might not be a coincidence - that just quietly participate - they take it in while all the others are talking and actively starting, moving, changing the conversations, the tempo, the topics - they just mostly let everyone else talk. I want to try that: it seems like it could be so enjoyable. Let others do the heavy lifting in conversations - I'm okay with that (I think) - well,okay I want to give it a test run - a trial. I like the idea, at least.

hey somewhat like sex maybe - lol; ok, well I won't actually go there.

but here's a meme -ok, we all have our dirty weaknesses & I like memes. They ask you questions - you answer and they run an algorithm & give you some feedback you probably already know, but may doubt about yourself. If they tell you something way off - well who posts those anyway? We just post the ones we like &/or agree with, right??? heh.

PS: did 35 minutes of Pilates & 15 minutes of weight machines/obliques, legs: abductors & adductors or whatever. yay.
Tags: exercise, ideas, meaning, memes, pilates, pschology

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